If a woman is not ready for a child, an unexpected pregnancy can be bad news. According to the study in 2016 in the New England journal of Medicine, about 45 percent of all pregnancies in the United States were unintentional. Of course, not all unplanned pregnancies are undesirable, but in some cases it really is.
If your friend is pregnant and decided to have an abortion (or leaning to this option), you will probably want to know how you can help her. Fortunately, there are many ways to provide support.
First, refrain from lubiprostone
This is the most important thing that should be remembered. You can assume that your friend wants to get an abortion, or, conversely, have a baby, but you can’t be sure that she feels really, unless she tells you about it in person. So instead of reacting with the phrase congratulations! or I’m sorry, tragarete impartial question the answer to which will help you understand what option your friend is inclined, for example, what do you think?.
If your beliefs interfere with to support my friend, explain it in the most loving way
Perhaps if you unexpectedly got pregnant, you would never have an abortion. For you it’s the right choice, but that does not mean that all have to share it with. Only your friend knows what is best for her. The situations are different.
So, how to behave if you are opposed to a friend had an abortion? If possible, just support her without judgment. For example, you do not want to accompany her to the procedure, then just listen to the girlfriend and treat her wybory understanding. If you can’t be impartial at all, then just gently inform. You can tell your friend that you are too sensitive to this topic, so do not want to discuss it to maintain friendly relations.
Focus on what is only her choice
A friend may ask you for advice, but this situation is too sensitive. The decision could only be taken regardless of the opinions of others. Your goal is not to convince her none of the possible options.
So if she asks what you think about this, compassionately and respectfully get away from the answer. Instead, Express confidence that a girlfriend has the ability to make the right decision. Say something like: You made the right decisions early, and I hope that you will choose the best option now.
You can also ask thoughtful questions that will help her make the decision, for example:
- What excites you the most?
- What are the pros and cons do you see in both cases?
- What emotions do you feel?
- If he knows about the pregnancy of the person this child?
- Is there important to you people that you’re afraid to tell? Why?
Engage support resources, if a friend looks scared or uncertain
This is an especially good idea if your friend is under a lot of pressure from other people or even herself. Refer her to a mental health professional or other health care worker who specializiruetsya on pregnancy and abortion.
Consult to your gynecologist at the local medical center, which performs abortions, or pregnancy planning.
Try to find the answers to any of the questions friend
Unfair laws and stigma of abortion and the deep-rooted economic inequality make it impossible for some people adequateprotection about the continuation or termination of pregnancy. Accurate information can help your friend to decide what best to do in specific circumstances and allow you to maintain your health. That’s why experts recommend to find out whether you need your friend to help you find answers to some questions about the process.
For example, if she has financial problems, help to understand the organizations designed to alleviate this burden. If she is concerned about local laws that may affect the process of abortion, read informative guidance on this issue.
Learning about pregnancy and abortion can be difficult, and you may not always be able to find scientifically accurate data. It is important to learn to distinguish between actual and incorrect information. For example, if the parents of a friend warned that the abortion will cause depression, tell her about the scientific evidence proving that the implementation of the desired abortion has no negative impact on mental health.
If you want to wait before having an abortion, offer her friend a ways to go through this time
According to the Guttmacher Institute, 26 States require a 24-72 hour waiting period between initial consultation and procedure. Or, maybe, theoretically girlfriend can get an abortion immediately, but she doesn’t let work commitments. Whatever the reason for the delay, help your friend deal with the waiting through movies, engaging in some new project or other entertaining events. Sometimes, distracting the situation the best cure for debilitating expectations.
Offer to escort her to a surgical abortion, or to be there during a medical abortion at home
Your friend may want you to be near, or, on the contrary, prefer full confidentiality. Best of all, of course, to offer help, but make it so that people had the opportunity of failure.
If the friend is a surgical abortion in the medical center, ask if she wants you to accompany her to the office. Depending on the institution, you may be allowed to be with her during the procedure or wait in the room for recovery, so make sure you check this information in the clinic. In General, the expectation of the end of the procedure may take a long time, so bring things that will allow you to escape.
If your friend is able and willing to undergo the procedure yourself, you can organisaatiot, which will deliver and pick it up from the clinic.
The second option is medical abortion which is carried out at home. If you feel the urge, invite a friend to attend at this point (after the second pill may experience side effects such as pain, bleeding and nausea, which indicate the termination of a pregnancy). You can offer to spend the night together, at any time to provide the necessary support. Even if a friend wants to be alone or with someone else, you can take care of painkillers, pillows, hot water bottle, the dessert and her favorite colors. She’s going to be great!
After an abortion, visit a doctor, then continue the consultation
The end of the procedure does not mean that you no longer have to be examined. Once your friend has committed an abortion, the most important thing you can do is learn about their needs and to continue to support. She might want to after the abortion, someone was there. Maybe she will need to massage the back, make some hot tea, to babysit, to bring food or to rest.
If a friend asks to be alone give her the opportunity. But experts recommended to be in range if she suddenly changes her mind. Try to offer: let’s agree that you will contact me if you feel bad!.
Convince a friend that any feelings that she feels normal
Some women feel relief and even some excitement from the fact that their life has returned to normal. Others experience sadness and regret that they had to make that difficult decision. Sometimes all of these emotions mixed together. Try to help friend to give up the belief that she feels not what you have. Remind her that this is just her experience, and she has the right to live it as he wants and can.